ARTICLES AND ESSAYS Splitting Hairs — an essayAvailable on AmazonIt is nine o’clock on a Saturday morning and, at my wife’s urging, I am headed to the spa for a little self-care—a haircut followed by a facial. But what Kristen promises will be a gratifying experience is tinged somewhat by the persistent, nagging thought that, as a guy, I shouldn’t be doing this. […] On the Path to Empathy, Some Forks in the RoadThe New York Times Modern LoveFor the last few years, my wife, Kristen, has been on this ungodly quest to become a happier person. And as with any worthwhile pursuit – eating vegan, for instance, or disallowing cell phones in the bedroom – she seems determined to take me down with her. This all started a few months before our 11th anniversary, when she marched into the bathroom I was in and told me that our marriage was over. […] Somewhere Inside, a Path to EmpathyThe New York Times Modern LoveIt wasn’t working, any of it. Our third year of marriage threatened to be our last. I’d become cynical and withdrawn, obsessive and preoccupied, dismissive and unhelpful. “I don’t know when things got bad,” Kristen said, wiping away tears. “I feel like I’ve lost you and I don’t know what will bring you back.” […] The Gift Was as Flimsy as My RationaleThe New York Times Modern Love“She’ll love it,” said the vaguely European-looking saleswoman, stroking the sheer negligee hanging seductively from the mannequin. “And not just because she’s your wife,” she purred. “Every woman feels sexy in lingerie.” She made a compelling case, but still I had my doubts about giving lingerie as a gift. […] How an Asperger Syndrome Diagnosis Saved My MarriageThe Huffington PostMy thumbs look like toes. It has nothing to do with Asperger Syndrome. It’s just one more thing my wife puts up with. […] AcceptanceZOOM: Autism Through Many LensesWhen we accept, we are able to see things and people for what they, how they are, and who they are, and only then can we love them purely. […] Releasing Gifted Kids Into the WildZOOM: Autism Through Many LensesFor all they knew, my parents had raised a well-adjusted young man. Bright, funny, ambitious — at the age of eighteen, it seemed as though I possessed all of the adjectives a person might need in order to be successful in life. […] Growing Confident: Parenting to Shatter BoundariesZOOM: Autism Through Many LensesRelentless focus on worry and dread has been my approach to parenting since my children we born. […] Shoot Me NowNBC — Rock Center with Brian WilliamsIt was a mild Tuesday morning in April and I was making the same breakfast I’d made every day for more than a year: eggs scrambled with cheese, oatmeal with fresh grapes, tea, and orange juice. Just another morning, really, except for the NBC news crew standing in my kitchen filming everything I was doing. […] How to Give Good GiftSlateThere is something a little creepy about people who, regardless of the circumstances, always give the right gift. My knack for giving horrible gifts is unparalleled; I’ve presented people with magnetic marbles and pictures of my head—gifts that were bad enough to jeopardize long-standing friendships. […] Love Is Blind; Marriage Is the Eye OpenerJohn Elder Robison’s Look Me In the EyeWhen people meet me for the first time, they’re often surprised to learn that I have Asperger syndrome. “Oh, my,” they say, sometimes slowly and clearly, as though they’re now addressing a child. “It is really remarkable how well you’re able to handle yourself socially.” […] Snakes Attack When You Least Expect ItJohn Elder Robison’s Look Me In the Eye I was out for my afternoon walk one day last September when I spotted a dead snake lying belly-up on the side of the road. He wasn’t big, this snake, maybe eight or ten inches long if you stretched him out. Still, I gasped, leaping sideways into the road to avoid stepping over it. […] PSYCHOLOGY TODAYThe Journal of Best PracticesThe blog by David FinchI am an expert blogger for Psychology Today, which is hilarious because I’m not a psychologist. I’m not even particularly knowledgeable in the area of psychology. And I don’t do anything “today” — it’s always, “I’ll work on it tomorrow.” Still, you should read my blog because nothing is more satisfying than receiving advice from an idiot.
